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 Post subject: Farmer and pet Rooster
PostPosted: Thu Jan 07, 2021 12:31 pm 
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Joined: Sat Sep 19, 2015 9:29 am
Posts: 221
Location: King Twp ON
A farmer decided he wanted to go to town and see a movie.

the ticket agent asked, "sir, what's that on your shoulder?"

the old farmer said, "that's my pet rooster chuck. Wherever i go, chuck goes."

"I'm sorry sir," said the ticket agent "we can't allow animals in the theater."

the old farmer went around the corner and stuffed chuck down his overalls. Then he returned to the booth, bought a ticket, and entered the theater.

he sat down next to two old widows named Mildred and Marge.

the movie started and the rooster began to squirm. . . The old farmer unbuttoned his fly so chuck could stick his head out and watch the movie.

"marge," whispered Mildred.

"what?" said Marge.

"i think the guy next to me is a pervert."

"what makes you think so?" asked Marge?

"he undid his pants and he has his thing out", whispered Mildred.

"well, don't worry about it", said Marge. "at our age we've seen 'em all"

"i thought so too", said Mildred, "but this one's eatin' my popcorn...!"


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 07, 2021 12:37 pm 
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Joined: Fri Jan 22, 2010 1:17 pm
Posts: 2904
Location: Kingston, ON
LOL, I remember the early days when the forum would change what we typed to "rooster".

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 07, 2021 1:16 pm 
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Joined: Mon May 26, 2014 1:08 am
Posts: 696
Location: Thunder Bay
Reminds me of the joke about the farmer who buys a new rooster, guaranteed effective.
First day, the rooster has his way with every hen in the henhouse, and a few ducks for good measure.
Day two he goes for the sheep.
After a few days of this, the farmer notices the rooster lying flat on his back, legs pointing in the air, barely breathing, with vultures circling overhead.
Farmer says, "That crazy rooster screwed himself to death" and walks over to check on the rooster.
When he gets close, the rooster says, "Get lost, you'll scare them off".

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13 springers and a few pumpers and pistols.
2 lathes and lots of scrap metal.

Too soon old too late smart.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 07, 2021 3:15 pm 
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Joined: Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:35 pm
Posts: 8170
Location: P.G. B.C.
That one made me laugh.

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Daryl


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 07, 2021 4:10 pm 
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Joined: Mon May 26, 2014 1:08 am
Posts: 696
Location: Thunder Bay
Dunno why I'm remembering these rooster jokes. Then again, its a good day when I remember anything... Here goes another:

Farmer buys a new rooster. Old rooster sidles up to him and says "You look pretty fit. You work out?
New rooster says, " ya, don't you?"
Old rooster: "Let's have a race. See if you can catch me."
New rooster: "I'll even give you a head start."
Off they go around and around the hen house until there's a shattering boom and the new rooster disappears in a cloud of feathers.
Farmer says, (as he opens the side by side ejecting both empties) "Damn. That's the third gay rooster I've had to shoot this month".

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13 springers and a few pumpers and pistols.
2 lathes and lots of scrap metal.

Too soon old too late smart.


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