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 Post subject: All true LOL
PostPosted: Sat Oct 23, 2021 2:16 pm 
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Joined: Sun Mar 16, 2014 3:26 pm
Posts: 505
This needs no explanation – and is a fun read, no matter your gender.
Men Are Just Happier People
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
Your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell you the truth.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom, because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress – $5,000 Tux rental - $100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
New shoes normally don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks.
A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Two pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original color.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
One wallet and one pair of shoes – one color for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache...
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes. No wonder men are happier!
If Laura, Kate, and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah. If Mike, Bob, Dan, Ed and Pat go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Bubba, Bird Brain, Idiot and Wild man.
When the bill arrives, Mike, Bob, Dan, Ed and Pat will each throw in $20, even though it's only for 62.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the girls get their bill, outcome the pocket calculators.
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale.
A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel. The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.
A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail. A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women somehow deteriorate during the night.
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears, and hopes and dreams. A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.
A married man should forget his mistakes There's no use in two people remembering the same thing!
So, send this to the women who have a sense of humor .... and to the men who will enjoy reading .

 Post subject: Re: All true LOL
PostPosted: Sat Oct 23, 2021 3:00 pm 
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Joined: Fri Oct 18, 2013 7:37 pm
Posts: 992
Location: Montreal area
:lol: :lol: :lol: All to good but so close to reality...

SilentMan... :drinkers:

TW1911, GSG 92, CP99 Compact, SW M'n'P 40,H'n'K USP
Crossman 357/6, SA 1911 TRS, Brodax 44
Glock 17 Gen 4, Schofield 3, Remington 1875, Barra 009

WE Dragon 7'' Hi-Capa, Glock 17 Gen3
M2011A1 twin, G&G TR16 dmr556
EMG TTI 2011 JW3 Combat Master

 Post subject: Re: All true LOL
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2021 12:08 pm 
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Joined: Sun Dec 06, 2015 5:03 pm
Posts: 1072

 Post subject: Re: All true LOL
PostPosted: Sun Oct 24, 2021 12:57 pm 

Joined: Wed Jan 05, 2011 12:35 pm
Posts: 8138
Location: P.G. B.C.
It's important to use good punctuation, period.
An English Professor wrote the words
"A woman without her man is nothing"

He then asked his students to properly punctuate the statement.

The males in the class all wrote "A woman without her man, is nothing."
The females in the class wrote: "A woman: without her, man is nothing."

But is it a lost art?

Best Wishes

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